Weekend sports highlights: Righteous!

I think Dr. Dre did himself a disservice by naming his last album “2001”. Last time I checked, it was the year two thousand and seven, and we don’t dig things that are 6 months old, let alone 6 years. I can listen to the hot singles every once and’a little while, but the short staccato beats of “Still D.R.E.” don’t evoke the same things as they did 6 years ago, through tinny speakers blasting at full volume, as part of the high school house party soundtrack.

Staying with the highs chool theme for a second, this weekend in parties was a text book neighbourhood high school example. There was the aforementioned music, representing a similar phenomenon to a fifty yearold’s obsession with Classic Rock 101. There was an abundance of females, many of which I either didn’t know, and a fair few I didn’t want to know. There was a chapped party host who was pushed aside by the patrons, proverbially and physically, and then as is to be expected, a tussle formed. It came together as naturally and lightly as clouds, the hot and cold fronts pushing their way out the house from the kitchen, pushy pushes down the hall and out the door, expelled from the house like unwanted matter, like too much food in the stomach of a bulimic preteen. A few more people jumped into tussles of their own, for some great reason I’m sure, and every fighter was nicely dipped in mud by the end. I was inside dancing the whole time.

The night was fun, but in the morning I decided it was neither here nor there, and to stay away from future house parties. I’m sure that resolution won’t stick; I’ll be partying by Thursday. As sure as I’ve already lost that bet, the sun came up on Saturday. At the early after noon breakfast, a cheap joint off Broadway, the young lesbians were in full force. I was enthralled and tried hard not to stare and imagine. Wild hair, ripped clothes, I think I smelled their sweet musky sweat as well. Dave can give his opinion of the girls too. One looked like a boy monkey. Breakfast was colourful. I’ll skip over Saturday night, as it was Friday sequel, with the same plot, and only a few different characters and locations.

What are your final impressions of this past weekend Ali?

-Avoid at all costs