Wednesday, September 24, 2008

INTERRRRRROBANG!


Though it may sound like a newly implemented CIA information gathering technique involving old school methods, updated for a sexually liberal modern era by throwing a little penetration-based banging into the mix, sadly it is not. The Interrobang is a punctuation mark, product of a 'colabo' between the necessary Question Mark and the sadly overlooked Exclamation Mark (unless we are talking about Elaine Bennes, of Seinfeld fame, known for her exhaustive use of the latter). When these two Marks get together, you can expect some wild symbols!

Here are some examples of the interrobang in everyday use:

"She did WHAT with you daughter's Ken doll?!"

Note: It seems I can't fashion an interrobang on my keyboard, no matter how I try to mash the two keys at a simultaneous moment. Alas. Use your imagination; when I put an exclamation and a question mark together, that will be, from now on, the sign of the interrobang.

"You expect me to put my lips on that rusty trumpet?!"

And so on. . .

Monday, September 22, 2008

'good for the tuna'


"Logic is a complication."

Tristan Tzara laid this down in his Dadaist Manifesto in 1918.

"Logic is always wrong. It draws threads of notions, words, in their formal exterior, towards illusory ends and centers."

It seems that George, through all his failings and flaccidity, had a Eureka moment, seen here in episode twenty two of season five of Seinfeld, entitled "The Opposite". The clarity and decisive action, seeming to follow logic that because "nothing's ever worked out for [him] with tuna on toast," that the opposite must, and will, make life better for George.



But where is the logic behind George's choice for the "opposite" lunch? As pointed out by Jerry, much to George's chagrin, chicken salad would not be the opposite; salmon would, on account of their spawning particularities. George's logic is wrong, but it still works.

Monday, September 15, 2008

?are bills going to get smaller?



Money failed! LOUD NOISES! Something is happening on Wall St. but I don't know what! I have no equity (I think, unless "equity" means an email address and a bicycle, in which case, I have equity), nor do I have monetary investments; I do have loans, which, if this downward spiral continues, the government, or 'Man' if you will, will have bigger fish to fry, in which case they may forget about my loan. CANCEL 3RD WORLD AND ALI'S DEBT! That would be pretty swell.
If not, I may end up selling apples (bum apples?!), en plein aire, all monochrome and sad about things.

More wi-nfo (contraction of 'wikipedia' & 'info'; let's try it out for a bit, see if it gets used) here.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

VIFF/Jason Statham Collabo


The Vancouver International Film Festival is coming up real soon; get your tickets now, that way you can get a seat to the the hottest review with a hot date you are trying to impress. I would, fo sho' take a girl there I was trying to impress, 'specially if she was into art and things like art and stuff.

I heard the new Colin Farrel and Jason Statham film is premiering there too; it's written and directed by Atom Egoyan.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

ashlee simpson is modeling Zeller's fall line up


You see it coming on television, in newspaper flyers and department store window displays and you don't actually think it could possibly happen but sure enough school starts. Summer ends and school starts. It was sunny today and it was hot and I even broke a sweat numerous times throughout the day walking around campus, but it is not summer hot, nor is it summer sun.

Summer was over when I got off the plane from Montreal to Vancouver; 5:30 in the morning, and the sun was appearing, only one wispy cloud in the sky, this was Montreal. 9:45, the same morning, but on Vancouver time, under Vancouver clouds with last night's Vancouver rain in the gutters. The streets were drying, but they never fully dry here until May comes back around.

At first glance, first day of classes, the line up seems great. Topics are of interest and teachers seem enthused. I'm already enthralled with the Greek epics. Really though, I am; Homer, together with the translators of the current editions, put together a mean manly tale. Though Zack Snyder's 300 was not exactly truthful (a relative term as it is), the gore and machismo in Argonautika is dope; Hell of different ways for ones head to be severed.